Today (2026-02-23), and in the last few weeks I’ve been wishing for something new. I don’t quite get what it is but I might have some ideas about it.

About life

Maybe my will is telling me to get something new, I’m already looking for a new job and maybe that’s it. Or maybe I’m looking for a new perspective on life because my old one it’s outdated.

I still follow my directives, like honor, words must have value, self worth, and other stuff, but I know that this world doesn’t follow anymore these values. I wished more people were more genuine and that they value more the old core values, but I see that that is more complicated than I thought.

I don’t ask anymore for these values in people, but that only makes me distance myself from possible relationships, no I’m not talking about love yet, relationships can be friendship, fellowship, etc…

Wishing for love

Unfortunately, like I’ve said before, the world doesn’t value old values, and do value fast interactions, ignoring that there is allot that people may be missing out. And like I’ve said before, because of the way people view the world, I step down and go to my safe space just because I can’t tolerate fast interactions.

Loving, for me, it’s a complete package that must have groundwork, not a thing to be playing like people played as some sort of toy. Feelings, for me, must come from the heart and these days, many people do not have the baggage needed for a relationship.

The relationship baggage, for me is a requirement, not an option. I wish that more people start to see the world as it is before it’s too late. But there is nothing I can do to make people open their eyes, I can write about it, but it’s always like a game of chess, I lay the pieces down and the world plays their move. When the world does that, I only can navigate within the rules that were imposed on the game. So I renounce the king when I see that the world chose again frail relationships instead of long during ones.

About friendships

Wishing for new friendships it’s a bit complicated for me, I’m not in the current social circuits, maybe because I don’t have the time for shallow interactions. I have some friends but they are busy living their lives and I don’t want to bother them with my bothersome life.

I know that my friends are there for me as I’m there for them, but my problems are practically the same. Social problems, employment problems, more specifically the lack of employment. Love problems, that I can’t find someone that corresponds to my standards. And so on.

Wishing it’s not enough

I know that wishing it’s not enough for a person to develop what they need, like social interactions, finding love, finding a job, finding new friends and fixing my problems.

I do several things for me to proceed in life in those regards and I intend on doing more to stop wishing and start doing. I still have dreams to accomplish and I didn’t give them up. Some dreams are on hold for a while since I need to stabilize my life in several aspects.

Final notes

This post was in draft hell, from 2026-02-23.

Update 2026-07

I found a new job recently and I really enjoy it. The team it’s great and it’s a new experience for me, sports, but I’m loving it.